With the Thanksgiving season in full swing and Thanksgiving Day fast approaching, many conversations are turning toward gratitude and expressing thankfulness. While this time of year is a great reminder about expressing gratitude, is it actually helpful? And if so, why?
In this blog post, we’ll explain why a practice that focuses on gratitude is one of the simplest yet most profound tools we can teach our children. Gratitude doesn’t just help children become more positive and appreciative of others, it also has a lasting benefit for their mental and emotional health. Let’s explore why gratitude is so important, how expressing it can benefit both children and adults, and the science behind why expressing gratitude works.
Is expressing gratitude really helpful?
The research says yes! Gratitude has a profound impact on emotional well-being, mental health, and even physical health. While it’s easy to focus on challenges, frustrations, and what isn’t going well, expressing gratitude can shift our focus from what is lacking to what is abundant. For children especially, the benefits of practicing gratitude are especially important as they begin to form their sense of self and learn to navigate their emotions.
But why?
Gratitude Boosts Mental Health
Studies have shown that practicing gratitude can significantly improve mental health. In a landmark study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, it was found that people who kept a gratitude journal (writing down things they are thankful for each day) reported feeling more optimistic, had a lower level of depression, and experienced greater overall well being.
For children, practicing gratitude helps to foster a more positive mindset. When children regularly acknowledge the good things in their lives, they’re less likely to fall into negative thought patterns, like anxiety or sadness. Gratitude helps kids reframe challenges, viewing them as temporary and manageable rather than insurmountable or overwhelming.
Gratitude Improves Relationships
When children express gratitude, whether toward their peers, teachers, or family members, it strengthens relationships and builds trust. Children who practice gratitude tend to have more positive social interactions, as they are better able to acknowledge the kindness and support of others. Expressing gratitude also encourages empathy—when children take the time to recognize the good in others, they become more attuned to others' feelings, which fosters compassion and emotional intelligence.
In addition, parenting requires close collaboration and communication, especially with a partner. It can also mean navigating challenging moments with your children. Research suggests that practicing gratitude can improve relationships by fostering positive interactions and deepening emotional bonds. When parents express gratitude toward each other, it can create an atmosphere of appreciation and support. A study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family showed that couples who practiced gratitude toward each other reported greater relationship satisfaction and a stronger emotional connection
For parents with young children, expressing gratitude can also promote a healthier parent-child relationship. A study from the University of California, Davis found that children who observed their parents modeling gratitude were more likely to develop positive emotional habits and demonstrate empathy and kindness themselves (Froh et al., 2010).
Gratitude Enhances Physical Health
Gratitude isn’t just good for the mind—it’s good for the body, too. Research has shown that people who express gratitude have lower levels of stress and inflammation, both of which are linked to a range of physical health benefits. A 2015 study published in Personality and Individual Differences found that people who practiced gratitude had better sleep, fewer physical symptoms, and greater overall well-being. For children, this could mean fewer visits to the doctor, better sleep quality, and a healthier immune system.
But How Does Gratitude Work?
The power of gratitude isn’t just anecdotal—there’s solid science to back up the claim that practicing gratitude actually changes the brain. Neuroscientific research shows that when we experience feelings of gratitude, certain parts of our brain light up, promoting positive emotions and mental well-being.
Gratitude Activates the Reward System in the Brain
The brain’s reward system, which includes regions like the prefrontal cortex and ventral striatum, is activated when we feel thankful. These areas are responsible for feelings of pleasure and satisfaction, which explains why expressing gratitude feels good. This reward system reinforces the behavior, making it more likely that we’ll continue to practice gratitude in the future.
Gratitude Increases Dopamine and Serotonin
Dopamine and serotonin are neurotransmitters within the brain that help regulate mood, motivation, and happiness. When we express gratitude, these chemicals are released, leading to improved mood and a greater sense of well-being. This biochemical reaction is one of the reasons gratitude feels so rewarding—it boosts our mood and makes us feel good both in the short term and over time.
Gratitude Reduces Stress
Gratitude also has a calming effect on the brain. Research has shown that the expression of gratitude can reduce the activity of the amygdala, the part of the brain that is responsible for stress, fear, and anxiety. As gratitude lowers the amygdala’s response, it helps to create a sense of peace and relaxation. This can be especially helpful for children who experience stress or anxiety, as gratitude can help them manage those feelings more effectively.
Gratitude Improves Emotional Regulation
One of the challenges that many children face is regulating their emotions, particularly during times of stress or frustration. Gratitude can serve as a powerful tool for emotional regulation. When children pause to reflect on the things they’re grateful for, it helps them shift their focus from negative emotions to more positive ones, promoting emotional balance. Over time, this practice can teach children how to cope with difficult emotions in a healthier way.
How to Teach Your Child Gratitude
Introducing gratitude into your child’s life doesn’t have to be complicated. There are simple, everyday practices you can incorporate into your family routine to help your child develop this important life skill.
1. Start a Gratitude Journal
Gratitude journals are a great way to encourage children to reflect on the things they are thankful for. For younger children, this might mean drawing pictures of what they’re grateful for, while older children can write about their experiences. Encourage them to focus on both big and small things—whether it's a fun activity they did that day or a special meal shared with family. Journaling helps children focus on the positives, fostering a more optimistic mindset.
2. Practice Gratitude Together
Modeling gratitude is one of the most effective ways to teach your child to express it. Take time as a family to share what you’re thankful for. This could be during a meal, before bed, or as part of a weekly ritual. Discussing gratitude together not only reinforces the habit but also strengthens family bonds. When children see you expressing gratitude, they are more likely to adopt the behavior themselves.
3. Make Gratitude a Part of Daily Conversations
Incorporate gratitude into everyday conversations. For example, when your child complains about something, validate their feelings and also gently encourage them to think of something positive. You might say, “I understand you’re frustrated. Can you think of something good that happened today?” Over time, this practice helps children shift their focus from what’s wrong to what’s right, helping them develop a more balanced and resilient perspective.
4. Teach Appreciation for the Small Things
Gratitude doesn’t always have to be about big events. Teaching children to appreciate small moments—a kind word from a friend, a beautiful sunset, or a warm cup of cocoa—helps them develop their awareness skills and an appreciation for life’s simple pleasures. Encourage your child to notice and name these moments of joy, fostering a deeper sense of gratitude.
5. Use Gratitude as a Tool for Conflict Resolution
When children experience conflict or frustration, encourage them to express gratitude as a way to reframe the situation. For example, if a sibling argument arises, process the argument and also ask each child to share one thing they appreciate about the other. This practice not only fosters gratitude but also teaches conflict resolution skills, encouraging empathy and understanding.
Gratitude is a simple yet powerful tool that can transform mental, emotional, and physical health. It promotes positive thinking, improves relationships, and strengthens resilience. When practiced regularly, gratitude can rewire the brain in ways that help children and adults alike manage stress, build emotional intelligence, and thrive in an often challenging world. By making gratitude a regular part of your family life, you’re not just helping your child feel good today—you’re setting them up for a lifetime of emotional and mental well-being.
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